Several times in my life, I've set out to make something happen that would be memorable. And I find that the harder I try, the less memorable it ends up being. Something that sticks in my mind tends to be unexpected, and the more effort you put into planning anything, the less likely you are to be surprised by anything that happens.

I'll tell you what never works: trying to reproduce a past holiday or event that was memorable. The harder you try to attach nostalgia, the more likely it is to slip away from you.

What ends up sticking out is based on serendipity more than intent. And yet we take cameras everywhere we go, and spend months planning our weddings. Nothing wrong with that, but I find it difficult to believe that all this effort results in the desired effect: a more memorable occasion.