What You Already Know
I had a friend of mine recently ask me what I thought of the BP oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico. As with most political questions being asked of me, I was completely stumped. That's not to say that I didn't have an opinion on the matter, but I still haven't learned to how respond to people when they ask me questions to which they already know the answer.
Of course, he wanted me to reply "Man, BP is evil!" That's the way he feels, and it's the way he thinks everyone else should feel, too. He's looking for me to confirm it. If I had already had my morning coffee that day, I probably would have responded to his question with my own question: "Exactly how am I supposed to feel about it?"
Politics and religion are notorious for harboring these kinds of biased opinions that rarely change, but it can happen to anyone, in any job, doing any kind of task. To a certain point, people are looking to learn more and get better at what they do. But past a certain point, they stop trying to learn and start falling back on what they know.
Most people start conversations and read books looking for confirmation. They're looking for someone to tell them that they're right, that their ideas and perceptions are perfectly aligned with reality, and that they should continue to do what they've always done. Even in the face of failure, it's not often our egos incentivize us to go looking for disagreement.
Big reveal: confirmation is worthless. Our brains are already great at confirming what we already (think we) know. When we solicit the time and advice of others, it's a waste to come away from those interactions without pausing to allow some internal dissension to creep into our heads.
Of course, he wanted me to reply "Man, BP is evil!" That's the way he feels, and it's the way he thinks everyone else should feel, too. He's looking for me to confirm it. If I had already had my morning coffee that day, I probably would have responded to his question with my own question: "Exactly how am I supposed to feel about it?"
Politics and religion are notorious for harboring these kinds of biased opinions that rarely change, but it can happen to anyone, in any job, doing any kind of task. To a certain point, people are looking to learn more and get better at what they do. But past a certain point, they stop trying to learn and start falling back on what they know.
Most people start conversations and read books looking for confirmation. They're looking for someone to tell them that they're right, that their ideas and perceptions are perfectly aligned with reality, and that they should continue to do what they've always done. Even in the face of failure, it's not often our egos incentivize us to go looking for disagreement.
Big reveal: confirmation is worthless. Our brains are already great at confirming what we already (think we) know. When we solicit the time and advice of others, it's a waste to come away from those interactions without pausing to allow some internal dissension to creep into our heads.